2011 Feminism

I light of recent writings from some fellow bloggers on feminism, I have felt an "opening of the floodgates" in regards to my thoughts. 2011 feminism: it feels different from the traditional fight for equal wages, the right to validity in our opinions (meaning not just the right to vote but the right to be heard in general this society, especially if we hold qualities that are not generally thought of as acceptable, read: lesbian, vegetarian, religious + so on) or the right to work outside the home without being berated for it.
The difference between traditional feminism and the feminism of our day appears to be a change of oppressor. Indeed, 2011 feminism leaves me feeling as though the entire feminist movement has become oppressive in itself. Because brave women have fought (and are still fighting) for the eradication of the stigma associated with the "career woman", I am expected to be that woman. This new feminism tends to define, once again, (as was the issue before traditional feminism sprang up) what a woman "should" be. Moreover, choosing to be a woman that does not conform to that definition marks me as at the least: dependent, needy and afraid, and at the most: anti-feminist.
I am aware that there is a delicate balance to be achieved here. The work of feminists such as Elizabeth Cady Stanton and Lucretia Mott is certainly not to be forgotten, and is a history that I deeply respect and am entirely grateful for. It was clearly a movement that was necessary, and it began long ago, (egypt? cave-women?) even before the 1700's, which saw Mary Wollstonecraft's "A Vindication of the Rights of Women." The very idea of "woman" being inherently inferior to "man" has been questioned for a long time, and rightly so. I definitely consider myself a member of the traditional feminist camp- and I'm very grateful for the progress those courageous women made.
The problem here in 2011 is that it appears that we as women must choose either to be the oppressed woman or the independent woman. And by that, I mean the "oppressed by women woman" or the "independent for women woman."
Damn right, I have the ability to do what men do (or better), to be a mother and work (if I so choose) and to have a valid say in things that concern me. I am not to be forced to be a house wife or to be domesticated, but if I choose to do so, I am in no way lesser or more needy than my fellow sisters who choose otherwise. I can think of no thing braver than being a mother; no thing more liberating than raising children.I find great independence in motherhood (or my plans for it) and marriage. I find great strength in learning and exemplifying domestic qualities. And yes, I enjoy cooking for my husband and making sure his clothes are clean for work. Of course he can do those things if I choose not to, but I feel no less independent when I am caring for him in this way. In marriage this caring can and should go both ways, thus becoming not a question of independence as "man" or "woman" but a statement of mutuality; of we.
The movement of 2011 feminism calls for girls to stand up for their independence, to make something of their lives and challenge the predetermined roles they are expected to fill. It is this very challenge that allows me to say, "I am independent, motherhood is what I'll choose to make of my life, and in that, I challenge your notion that the role of "career-woman, paying for everything myself and opening my own doors" is the only one that equals worth.*all photos by the awesome Justin Hackworth.