A christmas story

Well, I've been promising myself I would write about the time between thanksgiving and February- so here it is.
Looking at these photos gave me a lump in my throat. They brought back the sting of those days. The ones before the Bad Day are the most heart breaking to me-- what I didn't know then. The naive faces. And then the ones during and after show -at least to me- the heaviness in the air.
But this is our history and it is life. And it is still beautiful to me.

Blogging from my phone makes it so that I can't control what order the photos are in and I can't write in between them. So, instead I will give you a list of what happened in that time:

We spent many days on campus, which is so pretty in the fall and always provided inspiration-- especially my morning walk to the GT building for my crazy folk music class. We ended the semester well and definitely ready for the break.

We took mad and al up to salt lake to a dance performance by repertory theater. It was pretty awful! It was about the environment and they, sadly, were just not very good. We left early and laughed a lot. Poor things. But we went to olive after and then wal Mart pretty late that night, where I took photos with the Harry displays. Seth commented that Ali was so sweet with him and grabbed his arm as protection while we walked the streets of salt lake and passed creepers. We ran wild down those streets looking for a fast food place because we were so hungry before the show. So we ate twice- it's how we roll! This was the weekend before the Bad Day. Last innocent memory for us and our family.

I don't have photos of thanksgiving day. I made green bean casserole all home made. My own sauce and fresh green beans. I made some other things but I can't remember. That was a hard day. I spent it with my family and not my husband. I remember feeling not hungry. But we made the best of it and I still did the traditional grocery trip with my sisters. I still smiled.

Christmas was a little better. Easier. We had Rambo, which I loved. I loved our decor this year and felt so cozy. We went to the festival of lights and waited in line for so long! But it was worth the wait. We loved it! I have gone to it nearly every year since I was little and it was so comforting to see the same little displays and go through the light tunnel. I didn't take my camera, just wanted to enjoy it. I loved sharing that with Seth. The dogs loved it too! That night we started our new tradition of Indian food on Christmas eve. It was so festive at India palace and so good. We are going to do it every year. Then, Christmas morning we exchanged our humble gifts which included individually wrapped promises and hand written gifts to each other. It was so sweet and fun to be creative on a small budget. We did stockings too- so small gifts. It was nice. We focused on Christ a lot this last Christmas. We also wrote something we were grateful for each day and put it in a wrapped box. We gave this gift to our savior on Christmas eve, and read the Christmas story. We bore our testimonies. Many tears were shed that night.
On Christmas day I spent some time away from Seth with my family. Not fun. But not long. Afterwards, seth and i went and saw we bought a zoo, and then came home and had Christmas dinner at our house. We put the table in the loving room and lit candles. I love that memory. We worked so hard on the ham, rolls, two potato dishes, salad and dessert.

Somewhere around Christmas eve and day I lost my wedding ring. It still makes me sick. And though I love my new one (probably more) I still greatly miss my ring. It was so special to me and I hoped to pass it on to my daughter someday.

After Christmas came January- fresh starts and spring semester. Lots of busy days. We had a wonderful new years, my favorite so far! We played and beat Mario on the Nintendo until about 4 am. Taking a break to light fireworks in a circle and kiss in the middle at midnight. I cried. I thought of everyone in the world wishing and hoping as the new year was born. I sat outside after Seth went in and watched the world celebrate. It was so special to me and something I will never forget- that smoke and those booms symbolized a united hope in all the people everywhere and it was beautiful to me. When we kissed at midnight, we timed it badly and our fireworks went out before the clock struck! We kissed in the seconds of silence before our neighborhood exploded, with the smoke whisping around us. It was romantic!

Valentines came and by this time things were getting brighter for us. My sisters came over more and finally Seth began being with my family. We had treats and India palace that night of course! We stayed in the rest of the night and had a low key celebration of our love. That sounded super sexual.. :) unintended. Though it was! Ha ha. TMI?

I think I've covered everything. I will never feel comfortable stating here what the Bad Day was. It is private and touchy, but something that is healing. But I do want to clarify that it has nothing to do with infidelity. That seems to be what people assume and it's not the case.

That was our thanksgiving, Christmas and valentines this year and everything in between. Like I said, it was still beautiful and we are stronger because of that fire. I am grateful for my life and marriage, and for these memories, hard as they are.